"Hey, where's your boyfriend? Have you hidden him somewhere?" A cheeky auntie opened up this 'sensitive' topic the humourous way.
I laughed out loud,and replied, "If he exists, He's still hiding in the will of God."
"Have you been too picky?"
"I'm actually open to what life brings me. If he comes, I won't refuse, if he doesn't, I'm also ok with it."
"Please, what's so good about singlehood? Isn't it better to have someone who loves and adores you?"
I did my best to replace the inner triumph with humility on my face, knowing that she means well, "In Christ, I am complete." With a smile on my face, I left the kitchen serenely.
For some time, I've faced Lunar New Year with dread, knowing the awkward questions I'll (as other singles will) be facing. I'm unaware when my thoughts of it start to change but gradually, I became increasingly aware of the good opportunity to share about my faith and how it affects my guiding principles and the hope it brings me. It might be coming from a growing sense of peace (that I have had for a few months now) of being comfortable and fulfilled as opposed to a previous sense of emptiness and the aching need to be with someone.
For "each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that." (1 Cor 7:7, spoken in the context of gifts of being married or unmarried.)
For people who came to our Hope only later in life and who were not born in Christian families, you might have gone through the same spiritual journey as I. Similar with other unbelievers, my security and trust was in assets, type of job done, our legal system and man's 'intrinsic goodness'; my hope and relational needs in men I date, friends, dream of the perfect family I'm going to help raise and the various societies and clubs I'm a member of; my esteem in praise of men and confidence in performance skills of public speaking, singing and the outward appearance.
It takes the trials of life to realize the innate imperfectness of things, so easily changed by economics, society and personal circumstances, that I've placed my trust, hope and confidence in.
Yet for the citizens of the world, these are still the only things, imperfect as they are, they can place their trust, hope and confidence in and they'll cling to it tightly, even desperately, for what better hope can they have?
It gives me a great wave of gratitude in expressing this to realize that in whatever circumstances I'm placed in - bright youth or doddering old age, in world peace or war, in wealth or in poverty, in sickness or in health, being married or unmarried - one day all these will pass away and our Bridegroom will wipe away every tear for "we will see His face, and His name will be on our foreheads. And night will be no more..... For the Lord God will be our light, and we will reign forever and ever." (Rev 22:4-5)
And what better way to live for the hope and glory of God than through our singleness? Witnessing through our lives that we don't run after the things of the world but simply to think, act and speak to God's glory, accepting with thanks whatever gifts our God chooses to bestow on us, working for our daily bread, letting our words be consistent expressions of what we're living through our lives.
Perhaps I may sing a different tune 5-10 years down the road (hopefully not!) but whatever I may sing in the future, this is the reality of how God sees our individual lives isn't it?
“咦，你男朋友呢，你是不是把他藏在哪里？”我一个俏皮的姨妈这么打开这敏感的话匣子。
我开怀大笑，回应，“如果他存在的话，他还藏在神的旨意里。”
“你是不是太挑剔了，谁都看不上眼？”
“我很随缘的，来的话我不回拒，不来的话也没关系。”
“拜托，单身哪里好，有人爱有人疼才好嘛。”
我尽能力谦卑的笑，因知她是好意相劝，“在基督里，我已得了完全。”脸上仍挂着那笑容，我安详的离开厨房。
曾经很畏惧农历新年，和它肯定（对单身人士）带来的问题。但是不知曾几何时，我渐渐的发现这是最好的时机，字里行间，我能够自然的表达我在基督里活出的原则，和盼望。 这可能始于我内心深处增强的平静感，这股满于现状的平安跟我几个月前感觉的空虚，更显示出强烈的对比。
“各人领受神的恩赐 ，一个是这样，一个是那样。” （歌林多前书 7:7， 提的是单身或已婚的恩赐。）
对于那些只在后来才渐渐认识耶稣的，您也许和我一样经历过同样的属灵路程。像其他的非信徒，(to be continued....)
No comments:
Post a Comment