Response to 'Letter to Christian Girl' / 回应‘致：我心仪的信女’

The original 'Letter to Christian Girl' can be found here

Preface: Although my sinful pride likes to imagine that 'Letter to Christian Girl' has me as one of its intended audience, my imagination of the response of the 'Christian Girl' will have me expressing characteristics that will be scoffed at by people who know me. Thus I have the vicarious fun of putting myself into the shoes of godly girls I know (yes, a couple of them are in my mind as I was writing this), to write a hopefully adequate response to this very touching letter.

Dear Christian Guy,

Thank you for your courage in sharing the truth of how you feel and and for your example of humility. It must be so tough for you to open your heart and risk rejection. Your letter makes me want to cry as I realize how much I am treasured and protected and I thank you for doing your best to guard my heart.

I am just an ordinary girl, who is blessed enough to have the privilege of being called to follow God; with my own personal struggles against sinfulness, in singleness and to simply live for God's glory. It concerns me that I'm placed on such a high pedestal: Will your efforts to grow in godliness diminish when you realize that like you, I am human? Will your attraction fade when you perceive I'm not as good as you had thought I was? Will you do your best for me and the people around us when you see I am not perfect? That pedestal is our Lord's.

How do you know I am not already attracted to you? My heart might already have been moved by your servant-heartedness as you committed to serving our Lord, His people or your neighbour He has made in His own image, not neccesarily through official church ministry, but in your life. Perhaps I am made to be your helper and not called to a lifetime of singleness, and as a result temptation is all around me: the unsaved who is only attracted by my looks or pure chemistry; the people who only call themselves Christians who have no qualms for pursuit; the knowledge that other good, godly girls are attracted to you and your character and thus the possible desire to extinguish my feelings that I will not compete with them.

I know that you are not perfect and will be more than happy to have us mutually support each other in our walk with God as long as your heart is fully set upon pleasing Him. Don't worry about being super-godly. However, how can I give you a chance when you don't pursue?

I will be glad to know you better as my brother-in-christ and will be open to gradually increasing degree of pursuit as you continually pray and grow more certain. Will you be patient to hold and wait when I am genuinely unsure and working out my understanding of feelings towards you and God's will for me? Will I know should you decide to end your pursuit? You will know when it gets to the point where the answer is a clear 'no'. Even if results don't work out as planned, friendship is possible.

I feel so precious at your consideration of so many issues. Thank you for caring to think through your options and for your efforts in guarding my heart. I thank God for the blessing of been in the thoughts of so devoted a man, who is pursuing His own heart. Until you are ready to take that leap of faith, I remain only as


Your sister-in-Christ

Christian Girl

Afterword: Truly humbled by 'Letter to Christian Girl' which makes me re-examine the triggers of feelings of attraction in me. It's only God who can cleanse us from worldly standards that define attractiveness and to pursue what He says are valuable in our choice of a beloved. I guess it's time that we start encouraging (interestingly, doesn't this word remind us of 'giving courage'?) godly brothers-in-christs whom we know are keen on a particular girl to move forward if the season is right, shouldn't we sisters?

And to the 'Christian Guys' among you, what are you waiting for? The stars (or clouds depending on the time of the day) to re-align themselves into the words "(Name) will definitely accept you."? ;) He mostly does not work this way, instead He asks us to simply trust Him as we take one baby step of faith forward at a time. If you truly mean it as expressed in 'Letter', I feel that you are definitely already godly and thus not unworthy of so equally godly a girl.

That's of course unless you are called to singleness for the glory of his kingdom.

华文版：

“致：我心仪的信女”能在这里取得。

序言：虽然我贪婪的心存希望这封信标准读者包括我在内，但是真正认识我的人肯定会发现我与这封信作者表现的性格有很大的差异。所以我有这快感，想象出真正跟随他的姐妹们对“致：我心仪的信女”的回应。

善男：

读了你的来信让我非常地感动。谢谢你分享你真实感受的勇气以及这封信显现的谦卑。这毫不隐瞒的分享以及冒着被拒的可能性很困难吧！你让我感觉到被呵护、疼爱。谢谢你守护我心房。

我只是一个普通的女孩，很侥幸的被我们天父呼召跟随他；有我自己个人罪过、单身生活的挣扎，凭圣灵的力量尽力为神的天国取得荣耀。你这么的高估我让我增添了些许顾虑：当你发现我像你只是凡人时，你会停止向着基督耶稣的标竿追逐吗？当你发现我没有那么好，你还会继续疼惜我吗？当你发现我没有那么完美，你还会为我以及周遭的人尽你所能吗？这最高位置只属于神。

你怎知我对你没有相同的好感呢？也许我已对你显现出服侍人的渴望深深吸引。我已注意到你 - 在生命里，不一定在教会里 - 对我们主、他的子民以及（他照着自己形象的）其他人付诸的努力。或许神指定我会成为你的配偶而不是单身，因此我生活里潜伏着许多诱惑：单凭容貌被吸引的非信徒，那口是心非、自称是信徒毫不思考的追逐以及为了避免与（那些同样被你敬畏耶和华的心态深深吸引的）其他姐妹们争执的可能性。

我知道你并不完美也很乐意彼此在这属灵的道路上互相扶持 - 唯一条件是你的心完全向着我们的天父。不要为自己的不完美担忧。如你不追逐，我怎能给你机会呢？

非常乐意逐步慢慢认识你，因你是我基督里的弟兄。也愿意接受你藉着祷告，祈求逐步展开的追求。当我举棋不定、发掘我对你的感情以及神给我的旨意过程的时候，你会耐心的等待吗？当你停止追逐时，我会知道吗？要是我答案是否定的，你肯定会知道。就算结果不如预算的，友谊还是可能的。

谢谢你考虑得这么周详以及守护我的心房，让我感到非常疼惜。我在这么追求神的喜悦、有挚爱心的人的思念里，真是我的福气，感谢主。直到你愿意冒险向我表白，我只单是你

基督里的姐妹
信女