Being His Daughter

A Single Friend (F): Oy you alright or not, now that's J's attached?

Me: I'm alright, why do you ask?

F: Coz I've personally experienced how different life could be when your close friends get attached and you're aren't. It feels like they've moved on to a different stage in their lives and left you behind. Your friendship with that person changes doesn't it? Doesn't it affect you?

Me: Yup, you're right in this way that something went "missing" when we pass the previous friendship we have. Sure she has moved (The word 'on' spawned another mini-discussion) to a different place and now has an additional role as someone else's girlfriend. We just have to accept that things change and continue loving them the way God called us to. After all, we can move on because *wink* aren't we called to place our trust and be filled only in Him?

To a certain extent, this conversation evoked memories of a much much earlier conversation (years ago) when, in an emotional moment, in the middle of a debate, my pa blurted, "You now call someone else your Father."

For it is true, that:
"I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty." (2 Cor 6:18)

I comprehend then, but did not fully appreciate what he was feeling. Now with such an experience under my belt, I start to understand a little bit more of what that sense of loss - like a vacuum in the heart - feels like which my pa must have felt for me, his own flesh and blood; a feeling which is a thousand times more than I did with a good friend.

For isn't this true with worldly relationships? Sons and daughters leave their family's household when they get married (in obedience to Gen 2:24 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."); friendships become indifferent when 1 or both parties get attached (or some other reasons that require a change in circumstances); husbands may feel neglected when the children come along.

Yet I can't help but feel that this shouldn't be the case when I become His Daughter.

For our worldly relationships are determined by space and time. Relationships are begun only when our paths happen to cross each other in the same space at a particular time. It could be in the same hangout, online in the same forum/chat room, same work place at the same time. And generally, these relationships are developed within the constraints of space and time at the opportunity cost of other relationships which you may be able to develop. Time spent with family normally means the expense of time spent with friends, relatives, colleagues, work and vice versa. True, the constraint of space is somewhat breached by modern technology: the phone, the internet etc but this case stands generally true.

Yet the situation with God, our unchanging Father, is different. He is beyond space. He won't be at the esplanade catching a concert at 8p.m Saturday night; He won't be logged on to gchat while checking His e-mail. He is everywhere. We come to be acquainted with Him through family, friends, colleagues, our own study of His Word or any other means by which He chooses to intersect us that particular space at that particular time. What's more, as His Daughter, given the Holy Spirit, God lives in me. (He is always in my space.)

Our eternal Father is beyond time. I can communicate with Him anytime: In the middle of spending time with another friend, in my personal time with Him, in the middle of working through a task. He talks to me through His Word, promptings of other friends (especially those who are deeply immersed in His Word), or reminders of previous bible studies I've already done. He can communicate back to me anytime.

A relationship that is beyond space and beyond time, shouldn't that mean a deeper relationship with Him needn't mean the lessening of our relationship with others? In fact, a deeper relationship with Him would mean the deepening of relationship with others. His second greatest commandment (after the commandment about our relationship with Him) is "Love your neighbour as yourself." Wouldn't that mean that being a Daughter that pleases Him should naturally lead to becoming a more loving husband/wife to your spouse? A more loving son/daughter to our parents? A more loving friend? A more loving employer? A more loving employee?

A lot of times, I'd wondered about the accuracy of the allegory of the wheel where our relationship with Him is the centre spoke while other areas of our life are the peripheral spokes that extend from it to our lives. Shouldn't our relationship with God be one more of those peripheral spokes and not the centre? Perhaps this is one of the factors why this allegory works and another justifications why we should be centering on Him in our lives (as if He needs another justification!) A great relationship with Him should generally lead to better relationships with the people God put around us.

"Taste and see that the LORD is good; ....those who seek the LORD lack no good thing. " (Ps 34:8;10)